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<blockquote data-quote="Peezy" data-source="post: 119191" data-attributes="member: 1090"><p><span style="color: #333333">A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">perch.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">It doesn't have any feet or legs.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The parrot says, 'I was born this way.</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">I'm a defective parrot.'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Holy crap,' the guy replies.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'You actually understood and answered me. !'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'I got every word,' says the parrot.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Oh yeah?' the guy asks.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you asked, I</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">You can't see it, because of my feathers.'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Wow,' says the guy.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports,</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">physics, philosophy.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">I'm especially good at ornithology.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">me, cause I don't have any feet.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer.!'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The guy offers $20, and walks out with the parrot.</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">Weeks go by.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The parrot is sensational.</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">The guy is delighted.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,'</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">and motions him over with one wing.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife,</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">and the UPS man.'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy.</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at the</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">door, in a sheer black nightie.'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'THEN what happened?'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Well, then the UPS man came into the house, and lifted up her nightie, and</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?'</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">'Yes.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and began</span></p><p><span style="color: #333333">to kiss her all over.'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?'</span></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #333333">DUNNO?!? I got a hard-on, and fell off my perch.!'</span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Peezy, post: 119191, member: 1090"] [COLOR=#333333]A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]perch.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]It doesn't have any feet or legs.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The parrot says, 'I was born this way.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]I'm a defective parrot.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Holy crap,' the guy replies.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'You actually understood and answered me. !'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'I got every word,' says the parrot.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Oh yeah?' the guy asks.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you asked, I[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]You can't see it, because of my feathers.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Wow,' says the guy.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports,[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]physics, philosophy.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]I'm especially good at ornithology.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]me, cause I don't have any feet.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer.!'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The guy offers $20, and walks out with the parrot.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]Weeks go by.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The parrot is sensational.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]The guy is delighted.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]and motions him over with one wing.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife,[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]and the UPS man.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at the[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]door, in a sheer black nightie.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'THEN what happened?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Well, then the UPS man came into the house, and lifted up her nightie, and[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]'Yes.[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and began[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]to kiss her all over.'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?'[/COLOR] [COLOR=#333333]DUNNO?!? I got a hard-on, and fell off my perch.!'[/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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