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<blockquote data-quote="James" data-source="post: 3108" data-attributes="member: 2"><p><strong>Men are just happier people.</strong></p><p></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"><strong><strong>NICKNAMES:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>EATING OUT:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span></p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>MONEY:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>BATHROOMS:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel ..</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>ARGUMENTS:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A woman has the last word in any argument.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>FUTURE:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>SUCCESS:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A successful woman is one who can find such a man.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>MARRIAGE:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>DRESSING UP:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man will dress up for weddings and funerals..</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>NATURAL:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">Women somehow deteriorate during the night.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>OFFSPRING:</strong></strong></span></span></span></span> </p><p> </p><ul> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.</span></span></span></li> <li data-xf-list-type="ul"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black">A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.</span></span></span></li> </ul><p> <span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> <strong><strong>THOUGHT FOR THE DAY</strong></strong></span></span></span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="color: black"><span style="color: black"> A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!</span></span></span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="James, post: 3108, member: 2"] [b]Men are just happier people.[/b] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][B][B]NICKNAMES:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]EATING OUT:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]MONEY:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]BATHROOMS:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel ..[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]ARGUMENTS:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A woman has the last word in any argument.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]FUTURE:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]SUCCESS:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A successful woman is one who can find such a man.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]MARRIAGE:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]DRESSING UP:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man will dress up for weddings and funerals..[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]NATURAL:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]Women somehow deteriorate during the night.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]OFFSPRING:[/B][/B][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [LIST] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [*][FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black]A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/LIST] [FONT=Times New Roman][SIZE=4][COLOR=black][COLOR=black] [B][B]THOUGHT FOR THE DAY[/B][/B] A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing![/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT] [/QUOTE]
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