The Official Jokes Thread
- Thread starter James
- Start date
Unless you are middle class and can't get jack...
if your in the top of your class and have kept a 4.0 and test with a very high score on your SAT's then some schools give you money to go to their school, it doesn't matter what class you live in
I was in the mens room at a Laker game a few years back when a real tall black man walked up to the urinal next to me...I hesitated for a moment then looked up at him and saw that it was Wilt Chamberlain. I was in awe...a great ball player in his day, PLUS known for "bedding" thousands of woman. After talking BBall a while I asked him what his secret was to "get all the women"?...before he could answer I also asked if it was true black penis's are as big as they say...he said well, if they are I was cheated out of it. I said really so what is it about you that women can't get enough of? He said, well when the woman lies down on the bed I turn off the lights and slap my penis on the bed post a few times which makes it bigger and hard as a rock...they tend to love that. I looked at him with amazement and a "you gotta be kidding me...that's it?" look at the same time. When I got home that evening I thought I'd give it a try...I went into the bedroom, my wife was asleep on the bed so I stripped off my clothes and proceeded to bang my willy on the bed post, didn't get too big so I did it some more...after a couple extra knocks my wife woke up, rubbed her eyes and asked Wilt, is that you??? 
......
......
yep, my 3.6, AA degree at age 17 and above average SAT's were not good enough for much....
so do you think a richer person would have gotten a scholarship with those stats?
we are getting way off topic here.
So horse walks into a bar and the bar tender ask "Hey, why the long face?"
up!...I was born a poor black child.....
No, but a poorer person would have gotten a boatload of grants, as I have witnessed
Huh...........
James
Staff member
Choose Your Birth Month
Jan - I ate
Feb - I fucked
Mar - I ran naked with
April - I smoked with
May - I ran shirtless with
June - I beat
July - I cuddled with
Aug - I needed
Sept - I shot
Oct - I shanked
Nov - I stabbed
Dec - I slept with
Pick the day (number) you were born on
01 - my lover
02 - a dog
03 - homer
04 - A homo
05 - a condom
06 - A toothbrush
07 - a hippie
08 - a glass of milk
09 - a porn star
10 - Paris Hilton
11 - the trojan man
12 - a teletubby
13 - the kool-aid man
14 - some crack heads
15 - an easter egg
16 - a pot head
17 - a bum
18 - a stripper
19 - a horse
20 - a homeless guy
21 - a drink
22 - my best friend
23 - the cookie monster
24 - my boy friend
25 - a bowl of cereal
26 - a golf ball
27 - a bag of weed
28 - a french fry
29 - your mom
30 - your grandma
31 - a mop
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing
White - because hoes keep stealing my tacos
Black - because I'm sexy like that
Pink - Because I'm good in bed
Red - because I have AMAZING boobs
Brown- because I had to
Polka Dots - because I hate my life
Purple - because I'm gay
Gray - because I love marijuana
Other -because I have double D's
Green - because I love to snort cocaine.
Orange - because I smoked crack
Turquoise - because I have a noodle in my nose
Blue - because I'm a pimp
Shirtless - because I've got abs
Yellow - because I didn't like the way he/she looked at me
Gold- because the people in my head were banging
Tan- because I'm a soldier boy/girl
Jan - I ate
Feb - I fucked
Mar - I ran naked with
April - I smoked with
May - I ran shirtless with
June - I beat
July - I cuddled with
Aug - I needed
Sept - I shot
Oct - I shanked
Nov - I stabbed
Dec - I slept with
Pick the day (number) you were born on
01 - my lover
02 - a dog
03 - homer
04 - A homo
05 - a condom
06 - A toothbrush
07 - a hippie
08 - a glass of milk
09 - a porn star
10 - Paris Hilton
11 - the trojan man
12 - a teletubby
13 - the kool-aid man
14 - some crack heads
15 - an easter egg
16 - a pot head
17 - a bum
18 - a stripper
19 - a horse
20 - a homeless guy
21 - a drink
22 - my best friend
23 - the cookie monster
24 - my boy friend
25 - a bowl of cereal
26 - a golf ball
27 - a bag of weed
28 - a french fry
29 - your mom
30 - your grandma
31 - a mop
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing
White - because hoes keep stealing my tacos
Black - because I'm sexy like that
Pink - Because I'm good in bed
Red - because I have AMAZING boobs
Brown- because I had to
Polka Dots - because I hate my life
Purple - because I'm gay
Gray - because I love marijuana
Other -because I have double D's
Green - because I love to snort cocaine.
Orange - because I smoked crack
Turquoise - because I have a noodle in my nose
Blue - because I'm a pimp
Shirtless - because I've got abs
Yellow - because I didn't like the way he/she looked at me
Gold- because the people in my head were banging
Tan- because I'm a soldier boy/girl
